alles verandert

alles verandertIk kwam toen we net in ons nieuwe huis woonden echt drie keer achter elkaar te laat voordat ik leerde dat ik gewoon mijn wekker een kwartier eerder moest zetten om te vertrekken naar school met mijn dochter. Ik vond het ergens raar, want nu wonen we echt maar 3 -5 minuten fietsen van school. ( ligt aan het stoplicht..) Maar toch moest ik een half uur van te voren beginnen met mijn dochter naar de deur te begeleiden, jas aan, schoenen aan, hup op de fiets en gaan.

Maar echt… Alles verandert! Het is gewoon zo. Het is waarheid als een KOE, zoals dat zo mooi gezegd wordt. Trouwens geen idee waar dat gezegde vandaan komt, als iemand het weet hoor ik het graag! :-)

Nu wippen we een kwartier voor tijd, en zelfs de laatste twee dagen 7 minuten voor tijd de deur uit, ondertussen nog snel onze schoenen en jassen aan doende. En elke keer op tijd. Wel net op tijd hoor trouwens. Ik moet nu al twee dagen haar fiets op slot doen… Maar goed. Een paar maanden geleden had ik serieus niet geloofd dat dit kon!

alles verandert

En ook op een diepere laag heb ik gemerkt in mijn leven dat alles verandert. En ook dat de mensen (incl. ikzelf) graag vast blijft houden. En ja, echt waar. Ook nog eens aan het negatieve. We denken graag dat dingen niet veranderen. Vooral als we iets echt niet zien zitten! Of als we alles al geprobeerd hebben. Maar weet je? Ik heb echt een paar hele zware momenten gehad in mijn leven. En telkens als ik het niet meer zag zitten. Of dat ik dacht alles gedaan te hebben wat ik maar ‘possibly’ kon doen? Dan kwam dat zinnetje in mij op. Pff ik weet het niet meer. Ik doe even niks en ik hoooop maar dat alles verandert. En weet je wat er gebeurde? Het veranderde. misschien niet helemaal op de manier als ik het wilde, of verwachte. Maar toch. En omdat ik die verandering omarmde gaat het nog steeds prima met me vandaag de dag. Het heeft mij geleerd dat echt alles mogelijk is, als je er maar in blijft geloven. Als je maar telkens voor de waarheid gaat in je leven. Als je echt door een waarheidsbril naar je zelf kan blijven kijken.

Ik weet bijvoorbeeld van mijzelf dat ik niet makkelijk ‘sorry’ kan zeggen. Vroeger vond ik het geen probleem. Nu heb ik er moeite mee. Maar omdat ik het weet, wil ik er wat aan doen. En hoewel nog steeds mijn patroon omhoog komt dat ik eigenlijk van alles (inclusief van mijn eigen reacties) mijn man de schuld geef. Onbewust en bewust eigenlijk. Wil ik gewoon dat het verandert. Wil ik gewoon dat ik te pas en te onpas ‘sorry’ kan zeggen. Gewoon. En daarom zeg ik sorry ook al voelt iets heel oneerlijk. Of luister ik als mijn man vind dat ik op een bepaald moment wel sorry had kunnen zeggen. En ga ik op een zo’n eerlijk mogelijke manier na, of hij gelijk heeft. En ja, dan heeft hij meestal wel gelijk.

Leuke, alles verandert

Deze eerlijkheid wens ik ook van hem. Naar zichzelf toe en naar mij. Ook als voorbeeld voor onze kinderen. Want als je samen eerlijk kunt zijn. Als je samen gaat voor groei, dan kan er van alles gebeuren. Maar dan staat de basis. Dan sta je zo enorm krachtig! Daar kan niks tegen op. Althans dat is hoe ik erover denk :-)

Hoe zit dit eigenlijk bij jullie? Denken jullie er ook zo over? Kan je super eerlijk zijn naar jezelf? Kan jou partner dat ook? Of soms wel soms niet? Ik ben heel nieuwsgierig! Laat het me weten in een reactie.

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